When I'm on a date I swing my hips
Yesterday we had a corporate party on the occasion of New Year's Eve.
summing up the results, rewarding the most distinguished in the opinion of the authorities...
and also my friend (and at the same time colleague) found on the Internet funny nominations and presented everyone with certificates and diplomas...
I decided to post it here because... almost everything was taken from different sources.....maybe it will be useful for someone or for myself (if I leave for another job)
1. If you work hard 8 hours a day, you will eventually become a boss and have the right to work 12 hours a day.
In nomination "Breakthrough of the Year" awarded......(presented to a sales representative who will be a Senior Sales Representative (something like a supervisor) with NG).
2. You cannot give everything to everyone, because there are many of them, but there is not enough of everything in the warehouse. But she copes with it. In nomination "We were daydreaming" awarded......(warehouse manager)
3. “Should I go to work?” - he thought... and didn’t go. But he doesn't think so. In the nomination "Thank God you came" awarded..... (driver who likes to disappear for a day without warning)
4. I make myself laugh with my funny face. In the nomination "Positive Attitude" The most cheerful and positive person in the company is awarded. (trade representative, the most positive)
5. If you get bored
And I've had enough of everything already,
Listen to her ringing laughter
It will be fun for you.
In nomination "Antidepressant" awarded.... (cheerful employee).
6. For a responsible attitude towards the work schedule: despite crazy traffic jams, world cataclysms, the fall in the dollar exchange rate and rising prices for gold and beer, he will appear in the right place and in right time. In nomination "Keeping up with the times" awarded... (forklift driver, it was the hardest thing for them to come up with, so it’s just a general nomination that doesn’t characterize them as a person).
7. The most attentive. Nothing and no one will be missed, everything will be noticed and recorded. In nomination “And the sense of smell is like that of a dog, and the eye is like that of an eagle.”, awarded...(given to the girl Torg representative), she is like that with us))
8. She will always share the last crust of bread with her neighbor, treat her to tea, offer a drink and not only coffee…………In the nomination "Self-assembled tablecloth" awarded (they gave it to me, because you can’t think of anything special about yourself either)
9. She recently came to us. Quietly and calmly lives and works next to us. But how many ideas are stored in this head? She will definitely show herself to everyone. In the nomination "Hidden reserves" awarded... (given to the accountant-cashier, she came to us not so long ago)
10. She is the most eloquent employee, she is not afraid to speak on behalf of the team, even if her opinion goes against the opinion of the boss... In the nomination "Speaker, Voice of the People" awarded (given to the Chief Accountant (she likes to argue with the director).
11. Brilliant carelessness and absent-mindedness.
He is always late everywhere, but
always and everywhere in time, although he
never there! How is it with him
it turns out? In nomination « Unbearable lightness being" awarded... (given to the head of the transport department. This is exactly about him, he always shys away somewhere, and then pretends that he has been working all day)
12. Dedicated to the employee, by the magic wave of whose hand any office equipment will “clog” into operation. In the nomination "Master of Golden Hands", is awarded (given to our operator, this one will definitely always fix everything. He once saved us when our server crashed).
13. It is from her that you can always find out what date, who did what in the company, why it is called that way and who named it. She can endlessly tell tales from the history of the company. In nomination "Keeper of Traditions", awarded (given to the Trade Representative, she is one of those who has been working here for a very long time)
14. This is the calmest voice of the company; communication with it puts you in a state of peace. You want to communicate with him again and again. In nomination
"Mr Antistress" awarded....(given to the calmest driver).
15. This is the very, very... head of the company. This is our most intelligent employee. This is our smart girl, erudite and intellectual
She is capable of solving the most difficult problems! In the nomination "Uma Chamber", awarded (given to the manager, somehow they also couldn’t come up with something interesting).
16. Kings can do everything, kings can do everything. And sometimes they decide the fate of the whole earth. In nomination "How hard it is to be God" awarded (presented to the General Director).
17. He makes an enormous contribution to the work of our company, while remaining invisible. In the nomination "X-Men" awarded (given to the second forklift driver, it was also difficult to choose for him).
18. A real driver should not count how many passers-by he hits on the road. The driver's job is to drive the car, and not to be amused by statistics! In the nomination "The cat that walks by itself" awarded (given to the driver)
19. He is engaged in expressing himself every day - he works hard and thoroughly. Not all is gold that lies poorly, but all is gold who works well! In nomination “Prove yourself - secure it” awarded...(given to the driver)
Comic nominations always meet with a bang and with genuine interest. Often they also need awards and medals - the nominees are real, not jokes)))!
Even the presentation of real awards is not always such a success.
To whom do we give it and for what reason?
At one person’s birthday or other holiday (entry to school, university, work, retirement, setting a record, receiving Nobel Prize, the publication of the first article in a magazine, the appearance of a personal blog, a victory at a dog show, etc.) are awarded only to this person, the hero of the occasion;
At a celebration of several people (a team’s victory in sports, in KVN, in some project, etc.), we present all these people with the same medals (or at least with the same inscriptions, and the pictures are close in meaning);
February 23 and March 8 - to all women and all men, without exception (check a hundred times that you haven’t forgotten anyone. Just in case, make a couple of spare medals with a universal text (they will also be useful for unexpected guests). But! Here you need to make them the same shape and size , but with different inscriptions: the more individual, the more interesting Everyone will be waiting, but what has been invented for them?
What are we writing?
Comic nominations for competitions and texts on medals.
By family connections:
The most best mom(daughter, grandmother, aunt)
The coolest dad (son, grandson, grandfather, child)
Eldest beloved daughter, youngest beloved daughter (I recently wrote something similar to someone in the comments)
By profession:
The most fashionable singer (doctor, stylist)
My favorite teacher (artist, traffic police officer - or what is the traffic police called now?)
The coolest athlete (banker, hacker)
(This doesn’t have to be literally, it’s even better if with a noticeable exaggeration: if you cut your neighbor’s hair, you’re already the best stylist, you managed to run to the bus, well, you’re a cool athlete)
By position:
The most democratic boss, employee, accountant
The most greedy chief accountant
Most Flexible Executive Employee
The most economic caretaker
Important! And the boss, and the supply manager, and the chief accountant - they are always in the singular. But still write the word “most” - for humor and light irony, which I hope they will understand.
By action:
I’m the best... handed my neighbor a chair (screwed in a light bulb, blew smoke rings, made reports)
I’m the fastest... I can paint my lips (I find a mobile phone in my purse, wash dishes (or I wash dishes faster than a dishwasher))), count without a calculator)
The same, but for kids:
I was the fastest... to eat the porridge (fell asleep during the day)
I’m the best... tied my shoelaces (buttoned my jacket)
For schoolchildren I can’t figure it out yet: my daughter is a student, my nephews are kids)) I forgot a little school topics. But you understand the idea, you can come up with it yourself quickly, the main thing is to write it down right away. Here's a little for younger students:
Miss curly curls
Miss the most beautiful bows
Miss the longest braids
Mister neat
Mister good manners
Our superman
Our protection and support
Our secret keeper
The smartest (decisive, brave, unyielding, persistent, obstinate, reliable, honest)
The most tender (wise, smart, correct, modest, elegant, fashionable, cheerful)
By hobbies and cute features:
World-class newspaper reading star
World class maestro of playing with nerves
Our personal astrologer (for the horoscope lover)
Fashionable thing (for a fashionable thing))
Our best florist (who loves to tinker with bouquets)
Our Sukhomlinsky (who likes to educate)
Young Michurinets (for summer residents of any age)
Bill Gates student (someone who is good at—or thinks he is good at—computer programs)
Our chocolate girl (the most obvious chocolate lover. That would be me by default))
Almost Hitchcock (for horror movie fans)
Snow Queen (to the prickly lady)
The Iron Lady (whom you decide; usually at least one person, but it happens)
Comic nominations and their winners:
Winner of the nomination “The Lady Checked in Luggage” (find and quote part of this poem by S. Marshak. This is for the lover of a bunch of bags, packages, string bags))
Winner of the nomination “Someone came down from the hill” (who lives on a mountain, a hill, or loves hiking in the mountains or ski resorts)
Winner of the nomination “You deceived me, you let me down” (from the Ukrainian song - You deceived me, you let me down - for constant liars))
Winner of the nomination “On a small raft” (this is from the song by Y. Loza, for lovers of mountain rivers, if any)
Winner of the nomination “I will ride my bike for a long time” (very beautiful song of my youth. A gift from me to cyclists)
Winner of the nomination “I’ll send him to...” (from Lolita’s song. For a lover of coarse language of any gender)
Winner of the nomination “Orientation – North” (from another Lolita song. A person at least somehow connected with the word “north”: lived, served, worked in the Far North. Or lives in the area of the Northern bus station (there was once such in Donetsk, and ours was not far away student hostel), or works at the Donetsk-Severny station, for example.
Winner of the nomination “You're drunk like a pig” (You're drunk like a pig - Verka Serduchka, one of New Year's musicals. This medal should NOT be presented, but shown and announced in advance that it exists, and if at the end of the evening there is a candidate for it, he will receive it publicly. But you hope it doesn't come to that)
For this block of nominations, it would be very good to collect these songs and play each one for 1 - 1.5 minutes while the person goes to get the medal and back. In general, short musical inserts (1 - 3 minutes) at homemade holidays are always very, very helpful: they smooth out rough edges and create pleasant musical breaks when you need to prepare the next competition or the next speaker.
Let me remind you: I described in detail how to make a medal in. If you don’t have room for both text and a picture on your medal, leave one, but read the text and nomination out loud anyway: you’re having an award ceremony, after all))
Another tip: when choosing texts and competition nominations for your company, immediately imagine who exactly it will suit. Only in this case will it be funny and fun. While I was composing and typing, I had fun myself, because I imagined everything that I wrote in relation to familiar personalities. If there is no suitable character, take something else, otherwise all my and your work will be wasted in space. And we need it to hook people here on earth))
With best wishes to bright nominations and nominees,
A very beautiful song and, in general, timeless. Listen!
P.S. The title of the next article is “The competition that is always with you.” Look what it is))
Comic certificates are presented for birthdays, weddings, retirement or other special events. Employees, bosses, relatives, friends and acquaintances are encouraged with medals and diplomas. The wording for the award depends on the reason for which the document is presented. It is advisable to use ready-made samples filling out the thank you notes that are presented for any special event.
Samples of letters
Examples of diplomas can be downloaded for free on the Internet or purchased in specialized stores. Electronic versions are printed and signed. There are certificates where the congratulatory words are filled out independently, or those where the text is already present and it is enough to write the name of the recipient. The advantage of the former in individual approach, in which you can choose any text - comic, funny, official.
For a birthday
The birthday person is awarded a certificate with an interesting congratulation. For example: “Beloved father and grandfather are awarded!” or “Congratulations to the most the best mommy Happy birthday to the world!”
For the anniversary
A comic diploma for a special anniversary will be remembered by the hero of the day or hero of the day. It is usually awarded for 50 years, 60 years, 70 years. The congratulatory recipient can download a letter with warm words from Putin, Zhirinovsky or another famous politician, singer, or actor. Birthday celebrants and guests will love the original signed certificates.
For a wedding
The wedding certificate is presented to the bride and groom. Comic letters are given to the witness and witness, matchmakers, father-in-law and mother-in-law and father-in-law. You can honor with a diploma for the active participation of cheerful guests.
Congratulations on your honors diploma
There are certificates online that jokingly congratulate students on completing their studies. If desired, they give highly specialized certificates: to a cunning lawyer, to an ideal programmer. Suitable options: “Diploma of a recognized genius”, “Certificate of a Bright Head”.
To a woman
When signing a diploma for lovely ladies, you should not skimp on compliments. The text says that the woman is beautiful, charming, gentle, sweet, smart, kind, with a good sense of humor.
To a man
A real man receives a letter of gratitude in the categories: “Golden Hands”, “Muscles of Steel”, “Sex Symbol”. The nomination depends on the character and hobbies of the man who is awarded the diploma.
To mom
Usually, the presentation of the certificate falls on the shoulders of the children or spouse. You can reward a woman for the fact that she is just about to become a mother. In this case, comic diplomas are selected for expectant mothers experiencing pregnancy difficulties.
To my husband
Wife
Parents
The certificate is presented to new parents in a comic form. Certificates are given at the time of discharge from the maternity hospital or after it. Diplomas for many years of conscientious work in raising children are awarded when the child has already graduated from school.
For children
Certificate nominations for kids are “Achievements in Sports”, “Outstanding Academic Achievement”, “Exemplary Behavior”. Funny nominations- “Miss Sweet Tooth”, “Miss Laughter”, “Mr Imagination”.
For girl
For boy
Grandfather
Grandma
Pensioner
To a friend
The joke is issued in the form of a diploma or postcard. My best friend will be happy original design diplomas. For example, a diploma is jokingly signed and a photo of a person with a friend is attached to it.
To the best friend
To the winner
For first place
An award sheet for 1st place or 2nd and 3rd places is given at holidays as a prize for participation in competitions.
To the head
The boss is presented with a comic letter or a funny order from the team of workers. The text talks about what positive qualities The leader has: wisdom, determination, justice.
To the boss
Colleague
Employee for work
To a conscientious worker
In a comic letter best employee worth thanking for Good work. Managers can summarize the year, ask employees to maintain positive momentum and continue to improve in their professional field.
To the teacher
To the doctor
To the teacher
When planning to present comic diplomas, parents can buy a little more forms. Then sign empty certificates for the most delicious dinners, good relations to children, games and walks on fresh air and give it to the kindergarten staff.
Accountant
To the builder
To the cook
To the driver
For sporting achievements
Awards with funny titles
Medals in comic categories
Diploma templates
Layouts of comic letters need to be cheerfully signed. If there is no diploma with the desired nomination online, then download blank diplomas and then sign them at your own discretion.
For example: “To the best checkers player!”, “Certificate for participation in the most fiery dances!”, “Juicy berry at 45 years old!”.
How to sign a thank you note
The text is the main part of the commendable diploma. Ready template found on the Internet or composed on their own. An important part of a successful congratulation includes a gift and receipt of a certificate by the hero of the occasion. It is worth taking care of the solemn atmosphere, presenting the diploma to the birthday boy, reading the text in front of the guests, and adding a few sincere words of your own.
Text for forms
The text for diplomas is the main part of the diploma. A comic congratulation should be kind and cheerful in order to bring a smile to the hero of the occasion. Those who want to write a congratulation themselves, take into account strengths birthday boy or girl, jokingly describe them.
Example 1
Beloved friend Allochka! I present you with a diploma for your ability to support with advice during a difficult and joyful period of life. You can talk on the phone the longest, party with me in clubs at night and find the most fun adventures. Thank you for your friendship!
Example 2
Dear colleague Irina Mikhailovna! We worked together for many years. Today is your holiday! You are retiring, but 55 is a deceptive date. Sparkling eyes and a charming smile reveal your true age. Irina Mikhailovna, our security officers have learned a secret: you are only 20 years old. Always remain cheerful, perky and friendly!
Example 3
Best friend Vladik! I'm glad that you and I are friends. You always do what is right and fair! It’s interesting to play with you and watch cartoons, overeat with cakes and sit at the same desk. You will always give me advice, and if necessary, you will decide for me test. Let this diploma remind you that you are my best friend.
Inscriptions in verses
Those with poetic talent can easily congratulate the hero of the occasion on their wedding anniversary, anniversary, even on defending their diploma in the form of a funny poem.
If congratulatory lines just don’t work out, but you want to write a poem yourself, then you can look up rhymes on the Internet: a fisherman is an eccentric, an anniversary - don’t worry, a friend - suddenly a spouse. Compose a short quatrain based on the rhymes.
Gratitude is given on various occasions: on birthdays, other holidays, out of a desire to thank for work or study. You can make a certificate of merit with your own hands or download it online.
In order to make a diploma yourself, take a sheet of white paper, A4 size. In the upper central part the word is written in capital letters: diploma, diploma, certificate of merit, gratitude.
Below is the text and signature. If desired, the diploma is surrounded by a frame; you can draw a picture or paste a photo in the lower or upper part. When designing, make sure that the sizes of the text and pictures are proportional to the sheet of paper.
Ready-made thank-you templates can be found on the Internet. You can download it for free and send the required number of copies for printing. Special design programs allow you to add new elements to the layout of the merit sheet. Original thanks are made in the form of a certificate, a Soviet leaflet, an ancient letter or scroll.
Today we are giving out comic nominations to people whose art is to successfully sell. These are sales managers, salespeople, traveling salesmen, consultants, and merchandisers. There are a lot of people selling goods and services. They have their own holidays and corporate events. It is appropriate to select the winners of comic nominations at these events. Managers and sellers will be able to choose the most suitable nominations for their colleagues. Let's start!
"Sell - and no nails..."
“This is my slogan and... period.” In the comic category “Sell - and no nails” we have a great winner. His name is (name is called). With a sweet smile, he will sell nails, screws, nuts, and other goods and even give (completely free of charge) a little of his good mood.
"My light, mirror..."
“My light, mirror, tell me,
Tell me the whole truth:
Do I trade faster than everyone else?
More dexterous and cunning than everyone else?
What question? Of course, the leader in the comic category “My Light, Mirror” is a born salesman. When he needs to sell, he gets real excited!
"Queen of the Counter"
She sells the product with such dignity! Her smile alone is worth it! The buyer may not really need the product, but how can he pass by such a beauty? You definitely need to buy something - and you will receive high-quality products and a portion of positive emotions.
“You, friend, should not chase after cheapness”
It may not be worth it for the cheapness, but for the goods on sale it’s quite worth it. Who is the best organizer of events? Of course, the main one in the above-mentioned comic category.
“This operation is known as rotation.”
Dear merchandisers! This comic nomination is for you. Choose the most worthy! He has golden hands. He doesn’t give up and never gives up, he can lend a helping hand and give you a hand, you won’t see him empty-handed, and he will never sit with his hands folded.
“And Vaska listens and sells”
Maybe not Vaska, but Petya Gromykhailov or Ashot Melikov, but, most importantly, he sells! Conscientiously lays out the goods, sorts, weighs, labels. In general, a worthy representative of the trading fraternity!
“Selling a refrigerator to Eskimos”
They need it most! They have minus 50ºС, and the product cannot withstand such extreme temperatures. And it’s much warmer in the refrigerator! So the Eskimos are wondering: “Atlant” or “Bosch”, “Samsung” or “Nord”. And the winner of the comic nomination “Selling a refrigerator to Eskimos” will best tell you which refrigerator to choose.
“The first fish is mine, and the second is mine”
We declare the best seller in the fish department the winner in the comic category “The first fish is mine, and the second is mine.” Fish is a good product, excellent fish is a royal product. That’s why we have a special relationship with fishmongers!
"Jester the Pea" or "Tsar Pea"
And who is the best seller of peas, millet, buckwheat, oatmeal, and rice? A fool! The main one in this nomination can make a joke and sell the product profitably. Yes, he has no price!
“Like cheese in butter...»
“Look at me, Glafira, inadvertently, by chance,
Grab a piece of cheese, because without cheese, what is tea?”
The best in the comic category “Like cheese in butter…” is a cheese seller. Dutch, Swiss, Adyghe - he teaches geography through cheeses. And he implements them better than anyone else!
"Greedy"
Do you want some meat? Steak, brisket, carb, shoulder, sirloin? This is for the winning seller of the comic nomination “Greedy Beef”. How she trades! It's nice to see. And he will give a compliment to the buyer, and sell the product profitably. A real winner!
"Two pieces of sausage"
Why only two? The leader in the joke category “Two Pieces of Sausage” will sell as many pieces as needed. And he will do it with soul!
Awards, presentation of medals, diplomas, nominations are always found at entertainment events and holidays with a bang!
Who doesn't like being celebrated among the many guests, while at the same time laughing at the rest of those present.
Nominations can be assigned at the beginning festive evening or throughout the entire holiday, as well as intrigue those present until the very end of the event and hold a nomination at the very end.
You can nominate for anything:
External differences:
- “The reddest hairdresser” - can be awarded to someone with a pronounced red hair color
- "Mini skirt" - is given to the girl in the most short skirt, and if there are several such heroines, you can measure the length and finally determine the shortest skirt
By character traits:
- Give “Modest” to someone who spent almost the entire holiday sitting in the corner and did not participate in any competition.
For professional qualities:
- “The most thrifty” - awarded, for example, to the chief accountant
- “The Most” - let’s say you can give it to the Boss
Although there is only one copy of these people in the team, so to speak, the status (the only one) will come in handy.
Because you are a woman:
Presentation of comic nominations for women's holidays:
- "Miss Beauty Long Braid" is awarded to a girl with long hair
- “Miss Golden Hands” to a girl who does needlework.
etc.
Because you are a man:
Comic nominations for men's holidays, such as February 23:
- “Super muscles” is a man who visits the gym most often, but if there are several such people, organize an arm wrestling or push-up competition for a while,
- “The Most Stylish” is a comic nomination awarded to someone who often surprises with their appearance those around you.
In these cases, nominations are assigned to all representatives, that is, all girls are celebrated at the women's holiday, all men at the men's holiday, and it is advisable to find the most best qualities applicants.
Comic nominations for teachers
, of course, in this case, all teachers are awarded; under no circumstances should you leave anyone unattended.
For belonging to a particular profession:
- "Super Doc" - chief physician
Nominations can be presented as part of the competition:
Comic nominations and their assignment remain the highlight of any holiday, be it:
For prom
Assigning humorous nominations to one person, for example:
Anniversary nominations
- "Assigning humorous anniversary nominations to guests"
New Year nominations
Anniversary nominations
- "Comic nominations of guests for men's anniversaries"
When rewarding applicants, you can note comic certificates or medals, made by yourself or using our options made with humor and care. Medals are printed on a color printer, cut out and glued according to the sample
Or ready-made certificates, for example in
